My sister always laughs and says “I can’t keep up with all your friends.” It is not that I have a lot of friends, it is that I recognize how important friendship is in life and especially in motherhood.
Friend Groups
I believe that there are different categories of friends. Not every person comes in the same way and not every friend stays BUT, each of them comes into our life for a special season and to help us with lessons along our journey. Throughout my 34 years, I have had some amazing friends, I have had friends that have broken my heart, and I have had people, that I never imagined, turn into a vital part of my every day.
Friends You Grew Up With
We all have this group of friends. They are the people who saw us through all the awkward phases of growing up. You all experienced school, 1st crushes, puberty, parties, and embarrassing moments as a team. There is a silent bond within this group. With social media, it has become easier to stay in touch with these friends. You talk occasionally, reminiscing about the old days and secretly being proud of each other (because we remember the braces, crimped hair, and statement necklaces we all came from). We constantly say “I can’t believe we are so old.” And can’t believe we are at a stage where we are growing families of our own.
Fellow Parents
As your kids enter the school world, you inevitably have to become friends with your kids’ friends’ parents. You cross your fingers and hope that they pick the kids with the cool parents (we can only hope)… I am joking (kind of). There will be endless play dates, birthday parties, and school group chats. These friends may eventually be replaced by next year’s parents but, in the moment, these parents are your people.
After-School Activity Partners
My kids are currently on the competitive dance team. No parent understands more than the other parents in this activity. My family, my other friends, and literally any other person on the planet do not understand. These mamas (and some dads), they get it. They know why we do it, they complain about the long hours but still make it. You will have inside jokes and will show up for each other and each other’s kids whenever it is needed. Whether it is dance, sports, karate, or anything in between, you need this tribe. Some of these mamas will turn into forever friends.
Forever Friends
Forever friends are few and far between. Not everyone is lucky enough to have a forever friend. If you do, hold on to them. This can be someone you can go weeks, or even months without speaking to but, you know that you can pick up the phone at any time and that friend will be there. These people may come from any of the previously mentioned groups. They could have grown up with you, met you in adulthood, or joined you on your motherhood journey but something about your relationship reassures you that they will be in it with you for the long haul.
Sometimes, in the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it becomes difficult to cultivate and keep friendships. Like any relationship, it requires work. Maybe it takes you 3 days to answer that text. You could be a day (or 4) late on a “Happy Birthday.” Maybe you keep saying, “We need to get together” and months go by before those plans ever come to fruition. Put the work in. Check-in with your friends. Take time to water your relationships and you won’t ever regret it. I challenge you to reach out to a friend today and let them know they are important to you.
Sweet friendships refresh the soul and awaken our hearts with joy, for good friends are like the anointing oil that yields the fragrant incense of God’s presence. –Proverbs 27:9