The Prayer of a Brokenhearted White Mother

Father God, 

Words fail me, tears flood me, and my heart is overwhelmed with the weight of our current reality. Hear my cry O God, listen to my prayer. I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint. When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I.[1]

I am a brokenhearted white mother who feels “there are no words.”

However, choosing to have no words is silence and I will not be silent about something that I know grieves the heart of my God.

The reality that black image-bearers continue to be senselessly murdered makes me filled with righteous anger, and desire your righteous justice. Only you are the Righteous Judge.[2] I know that you will one day make all things right – but now, Lord – here, in June 2020 – move in our hearts, in my heart, to make our love for the black community genuine. Oh that we would, “abhor what is evil and cling to what is good.”[3] May we “learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed.”[4]

I repent for ways I have been silent, ignorant, or complacent.

Collectively, stir in hearts around the world to have more than sorrow but to also repent of the sin of racism.[5] As you have done for centuries through the finished work of Christ, continue to: open blind eyes, free captives, release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness. [6]

As my babies sleep soundly in their rooms, I plead for your comfort to tangibly surround black mothers who are grieving the loss of their babies, no matter their age. God of all comfort, engulf them with your comfort. Teach me how to best wrap my arms around black mothers in our community during this time and always.

Raise up a generation of mothers who will link arms and raise our children with knowledge, understanding, and a deep love for your beautiful, diverse design displayed in men and women of every tribe and tongue under the sun – a people you have created, formed, and made for your own glory and in your own image.[7] 

May we treasure, protect, defend, advocate, and ally with those who look different than us.

Why? Because their worth and value is rooted in being designed by You.

I know that refusing to “get our hands dirty in the messy pursuit of justice only ends up staining them with guilt.”[8]

Oh Lord, have mercy on us and don’t just change us — Transform us and begin with this brokenhearted white mother.

Help us O God to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with you. 

“We pray that the compounding of sorrows will not compound our sins, but send us desperate and running to the risen Savior, our only hope, Jesus Christ. O Jesus, for this you died! That you might reconcile hopeless, hostile people to God and to each other. You have done it for millions by grace through faith. Do it, Lord Jesus, we pray. Amen.”[9] 

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1 Psalm 61:1-2

2 Psalm 7:11

3 Romans 12:9

4 Isaiah 1:17

5 2 Corinthians 7:10

6 John 19:30, Ephesians 2:8-9, Isaiah 42:7

7 Isaiah 43:7, Genesis 1:27

8 Oh God, Make Us Angry! The Gospel Coalition

9 The Sorrows of Minneapolis, A Prayer for our City by: John Piper