Bittersweet: The Decision to Have Our Last Baby

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The decision that our second child would be our last baby, wasn’t an easy one to make. However, with a difficult labor and birth with my first and a high risk pregnancy with my second, both my husband and I knew that our family was complete. 

I always feared if I would “know” when I was done having kids.

But when my husband and I had the conversation about how difficult this last pregnancy had been on our family, I knew it was the right decision for us just to have two kids.

Throughout my pregnancy and even after our baby was born, I continued to feel at peace with our decision. Even now I know that this was the right decision for our family.

However, I was completely unprepared for how emotional I would feel after each milestone had passed.

Each little stage my baby would leave behind, would be my absolute last one. And let me tell you, each season hasn’t been easy. We’re nearing a year with him and we’re not sleeping through the night yet. I’m pretty ready for that stage to pass.

Decision to Have Last Baby Miami Moms Blog

But with babyhood there’s also so many sweet moments that you wish you could absolutely slow down.

Like those early months where he would so easily fall asleep on my chest, or his first little coo’s and aah’s, or the first time he smiled and belly laughed. I am trying so hard to bottle it all up and keep it close to my heart, because my first daughter has taught me that it all goes by too fast.

That those baby rolls soon turn into little skinny toddler legs that move at any chance they get. And that he will soon be just too heavy to fall asleep in the carrier as I take my daughter to the park. A time will come when I will no longer smell that yummy baby smell.

Don’t get me wrong it hasn’t been easy having two little ones. Managing all of the things, taking care of all the needs, correcting and wiping all of the tears; mine and theirs. I remember that when people comment on how I “should enjoy every moment.” I also know they so often forget of all of the hard times that come along with having young children.

But don’t we all forget? Don’t we all want to remember the good and beautiful times with our little babies?

I just want to encourage you, Mama, who may be having one of those difficult days. That once you’re out of this stage you will forget all of the bad times, all of the sleepless nights and all we will remember are the beautiful times that our children so seldom give us. And when they’re all grown we will also want to have these moments back.

2 COMMENTS

  1. Juli, what a wonderful article! I can totally relate although my situation is quite different. When I met my husband, he already had an amazing son. We recently expanded our family with another baby boy and my husband feels like we are done. I had an unexpected natural delivery and even though it was difficult and I was unprepared, I feel like I can do it all over again! I am not ready for Jax to be my last baby so I hope my husband comes around.

  2. This is so sincere and heartfelt. I enjoyed thoroughly reading your words, your heart and your perspective. I’m not a mom yet but you make me look forward to it. Thank you for the love you represent, in hind sight your message was universal.

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