Empty Nest: Going Back to Work After Being a Stay-At-Home Mom

Getting married, having kids, and raising a family. All things we have been taught to do growing up. Being a mom is the most rewarding job in the world. But what happens when you are a stay-at-home mom and your kids are all grown adults now? Well, some decide to get a job. What… getting a job now? That’s crazy. I’m here to tell you it’s a lot of things, not just crazy.

I was a stay-at-home mom for about 13 years. I wouldn’t change a thing about it. I took kids to school, picked them up, and took them to their sports practices, and games. Even went with them on field trips. Helped with homework when they were little, bathed them, and off to bed. As they were teenagers now let’s add taking them to friends’ houses, picking them up, taking them to work, and picking them up late at night. It’s a never-ending job. But what happens when they are grown and graduate from school, drive and move out?

What now?

You feel lost–like, what am I supposed to do now? Your day seems slow. Yes, you can just do nothing. But I’m going to be honest–I was dying to not have to wake up early and take kids to school or any of those things anymore. But when it stopped I began wishing I had it all back again. I missed that time with them and feeling so useful. Feeling like nothing will succeed without me running the train. But when you’re left with that feeling of no one needing to be taken anywhere or picked up, it feels empty. I guess that’s why they say you’re an empty nester now. At that moment I understood it.

I was home alone for most of the day while my husband worked. And one day I felt like I needed to fill the emptiness I was feeling. So I decided to go back to work after 13 years. WHAT?! Crazy, some say. Some even said, Why would you want to go to work when you can just be home doing nothing? It was scary, crazy, and needless to say overwhelming.

I started to look for work.

Many resumes and applications were sent. But no calls. I mean, I have tough competition out there. Let’s begin with it being many years since I worked, there are a lot of new systems out there, and people more qualified than me. I was like, I’m just a stay-at-home mom/wife with an empty nest; who wants to hire me? 

Interview After Interview

I went on interviews. And interview after interview, I would receive rejection emails saying, Sorry, we went with another candidate. They were beginning to all look the same. Some of the interviewers even said, Wow, it’s been a while since you worked. It began to feel discouraging. Was I only good enough to raise kids and now nothing? I felt like I was at a low point. Raising kids was an amazing job but apparently, jobs weren’t impressed by that. I’m like I can definitely multi-task, I’ve got three kids. But that didn’t seem to help me.

I knew my worth. I knew someone would see my worth and give me a chance. My husband saw my worth and told me not to give up, the right one would come along and be lucky to have me. Boy, am I lucky to have such an amazing supportive husband. I could have given up, but then one day I got a job offer. What?! OMG, I got a job–someone believes in me!

But then as fast as the excitement arrived, fear, stress, and feelings of overwhelm arrived.

I was like, what am I doing? This is crazy. I haven’t worked in a long time. I have no idea where to begin. So nervous, like a little kid starting kinder. But this is what I wanted to try and do. This is what I have been working to do. So I put my big girl pants on and accepted the job. Training was intense; I felt like I was very lost but then it all just started to click. I felt amazing. The support of my family was what really helped push me through it all. Here I am one year later at that new job I took and I survived the hard, stressful time over the younger more experienced new hires.

So I’m here to tell you that you’re not just a stay-at-home mom/wife. Don’t feel like you’re nothing when they leave the nest. Because I am proof that you can do anything… and so much more.