Stress. It seems that in every conversation I have with another mom, the “Mom Stress” always pops up. Life is busy and we want to do it ALL, and furthermore, be GREAT at it all. We are mothers, wives, friends, and employees; we take care of our homes and work out and… the list goes on and on.
Do you suffer from “Mom Stress?”
The 21st Century has given us many great “smart tools” like the internet, cell phones, social media and tons of information. However, each day still has just 24 hours and we still find ourselves full of stress.
The mom conversations I have always tend to go the same way. We are doing so much, but we still want and feel the need to do more. What I’ve mostly heard and felt from every mom is that we suffer some kind of guilt. If we are working, we feel guilty that we are not spending enough time with our kids. Then, because of the guilt, we might miss a networking event, a work-out, or just some time for ourselves. After that, in order to compensate for the missed time, we race back to the house to do something to show our families that we do truly care. We never allow ourselves to rest from all of the stress!
Are we overdoing it?
We feel the constant necessity to be good at everything, to show that we can “do it all,” and to always go a step further. We all need to have superpowers, or so we think. But we are forgetting that even super heroes have a secret identity that allows them to rest and slow down.
Who is judging us?
We live our lives as though we are inevitably performing for a panel of judges. But guess what, they actually don’t exist. We stress because we ultimately judge ourselves and we expect more than we do from anyone else. We want everything to be done. Everyone to be happy. We want perfection, and we lose much more in the pursuit of it.
We regularly multitask. We can cook, be on the phone and put some laundry in the washer at the same time. Yes, we can and we do it, but how many times do we overcook the pasta or drop the phone and break it? Multitasking doesn’t mean we are doing it all well, it just means we are trying to do it all.
When we are with our kids the situation becomes even more challenging and marked by stress. Helping with the homework and confirming the next day’s conference call at the same time may result in the wrong answer to the math problem and telling your client you can be on the phone call at 4am.
What would it look like if we stopped? If we were fully present, where we are? Instead of seeking to do it all, let’s simply enjoy being in the moment. After all, our kids need happy moms, not perfect ones.
