The best way I can explain radical self-love for myself would be to love myself as deeply as I love my children.
Radical self-love means forgiving ourselves and knowing we are loveable and deserving, even when we make mistakes or don’t live up to our own or others’ expectations.
It means wholeheartedly caring for our own well-being. When radical self-love is achieved, I think we set ourselves up for unlimited success and happiness.
I say “we” because I’m not immune to our culture’s lived experience that tells us we aren’t good enough unless we are [fill in the blank]…
…thin enough
…wealthy enough
…pretty enough
…smart enough
…giving/helpful/nurturing/self-sacrificing enough
…productive enough
I’m on this journey toward radical self-love with you.
I may not be able to practice it as often or as deeply as I’d like to but I’m certainly going to work my hardest to get there. Through years of self-growth, I’ve at least realized that even if I’m not able to practice it 100% I do deserve it and so do YOU!!! We all do.
If you struggle to…
• set boundaries w/ others
• feel as if you are worth it or capable
• prioritize your needs
• make time for yourself
…Then jump on this journey to radical self-love with me.
Here is a simple exercise you can do when you find yourself in a situation where you are struggling to practice self-love. This often shows up as not feeling good enough, feeling like you failed, or feeling taken advantage of.
Imagine someone that you would do anything for or that you have a lot of compassion for:
• Your kids
• A friend or spouse
• The 6-year-old version of you
• A parent or family member
What would you say to them in that situation?
What would you advise them to do?
Most likely you’d fact check their negative self-talk, encourage them and help them see how amazing they are. You’d let them know they are worthy of happiness, even if it means setting boundaries and disappointing others. You’d remind them what a valuable person they are even when they’ve made a mistake.
Now, see if you can give yourself that same compassion and encouragement.
Ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” then remind yourself it’s okay to meet that need even if it means someone else will be disappointed or you don’t meet your own expectations.
Some people see this as selfish, but I am going to challenge that. When we practice radical self-love it allows us to show up for those we love with a full cup and able to give. Most of us don’t want to feel as though our loved ones are getting drops of us because we haven’t filled our own cup.
Practicing radical self-love prevents us from feeling motivated by shame and feelings of inadequacy. It allows us to meet our own needs 1st so we can live to our potential, be happy, and have a positive body and self-image.
What are some ways that you like to practice radical self-love?
