When you look around at your fellow mama’s you will usually see a mix of cool, calm, and collected and EXAUSTED! This is where the concept of self-care has been skewed. To be totally transparent, I learned what boundaries were at 53. And boundaries are a necessary component of adding in the time for self-care and YOU.
As a mom, our lives tend to revolve around our partner, kids, and family duties. I hate to break it to you, but that’s all WRONG. Without self-care, we create a hamster wheel of life, doing the same thing over and over again, simply trying to get by.
Yes, our kids and family are important, but guess what?? If we are not taking care of our needs and doing the things that make us feel healthy and alive, then how can we motivate, inspire, and encourage those around us without being a FRAUD.
Yup, I used the “F” word–someone has to. Many of us pretend that all is good, and we are fabulous, while really hoping for a decent night’s sleep and a shower, at the very least. I believe impostor syndrome started with moms, not bloggers. We want everyone to be happy, healthy, and wise, yet without giving ourselves the time we need.
With all that said, here are my favorite priorities in a self-care routine. See if there’s anything you can use…
1. I wake up before anyone in the house so that I can enjoy my breakfast and tea in peace.
I listen to motivational videos on YouTube as my morning meditation. This way, once the family charges in, I am calm and ready to move the troops off to school and beyond.
2. STRESS is the root of all evil. When you break down poor health, disease, and an inefficient immune system, stress is a primary culprit.
I do something every day for me. It doesn’t have to be huge. It could simply mean that I stop for a cup of tea or take a walk outside, but it’s something that I want to do. This helps me clear my head and understand my triggers so that stress doesn’t show it’s evil head.
3. MOVE! Many moms that I deal with in my practice are fried, and I get it. I have 2 kids of my own.
What most don’t understand, is that the energy I have throughout the day comes with the way I move. My movement does include exercise, but it also includes me running up and down our stairs. Yes, I said running. It includes me walking very quickly through Costco, and includes me carrying heavy bags, boxes, and more, just to finish up errands and build my muscles. One thing I have learned, perception is everything. If we perceive our errands and tasks to be mundane, our body will feel that as well. On the flip side, if we look at some of these things as a great way to burn calories and add up a few exercise minutes, and then a new kind of energy appears!
4. Your closet, the shower, and YOU.
This may sound silly but many of our self-care rituals start with a few fundamentals. Taking the time to set up your vanity, closet, and bathroom makes your routines much easier to maneuver. I walked into a client’s closet the other day to find piles of laundry, books, and other things that had no place in her closet. What is that about? We all deserve to be able to calmly open the closet and get dressed, easily find our belongings, and get ready for the day ahead. Not to mention those mamas that haven’t bathed in days, my friends, this is where boundaries come in. Say NO, do what you need in order to have the time to shave your legs in peace.
5. Eat like the champion MOM you are.
This thing of eating your kids’ leftovers or surviving on coffee is NOT healthy, for anyone. Especially a mom. Believe it or not, you are an athlete of sorts. You are juggling many things at once, and you have to be good at many things at once. Then you have to deal with time constraints, so you have to boogy to make it to school pick up or somewhere else on the agenda.
With this type of day, your foods should empower your health and your energy. You cannot afford to have an immune system that’s on the fritz, you need it strong! Eating plenty of fruits and vegetables combined with quality protein and fats, is key. Junk food, packaged foods, and too many sugars (from sugar, flour, and dairy), will only exhaust your energy centers and leave you craving more caffeine. You are what you eat. Eat like a CHAMPION MOM!
Selfishness: What It Is & What It Isn’t
The dictionary defines selfish as (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure. The dictionary also defines self-care as the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one’s own health.
These are not created equal and when someone refers to you as selfish just because you decided to go to the bathroom ALONE. I want you to have a clear distinction of what selfishness is. As moms, everyone seems to view us as the chauffeur, dishwasher, housekeeper, and bank. If we don’t start emphasizing our time for self-care, no one will do it for us. Our family only benefits once they see the results of a daily self-care routine. You are the only one who can put the plan into action and stick to it, until the rest of the family starts to revel in the results. You’ve got this, I know you do.
In Peace and Love,